The local comic book store holds weekly anime screenings where beards gather to see the latest and snuggle up against their pillows. I used to go to see them from time to time, but now they have a picture of me behind the counter with instructions to call the cops if I show up. Looking back, I probably shouldn't have snorted all that Viagra before I went. There wasn't even any explicit sex or toplessness on the screen during my incident. I could have saved myself another indecent exposure charge if I had stayed home and turned on HentaiTube.