There was a time when I thought I was way too cool for sex toys, too young and too creative to need such accessories. Vibrators and handcuffs were for housewives who were bored or had difficulty coming and trying to "spice things up", I (wrongly) assumed. In my naivety, I thought it was lame to spend my hard-earned euros on cheesy pornographic accessories when my partner and I should obviously be able to create more than enough excitement ourselves.
Until I went to school. I had had a vibrator for years, something cool and avant-garde that looked more like a pen than a sex toy, but I rarely used it. Other toys never intrigued me enough to make it seem worth trying them, let alone buying them, until my boyfriend dragged me into one of the most famous sex shops and told me he wanted to try something new.
In my opinion, all partners should be good, generous and playful in bed, so it would be sad for me to reject my boyfriend's idea and not give him a chance. And so we bought an anal plug - "for beginners" according to the over-enthusiastic saleswoman - and a pair of handcuffs, "Take the velvet pair," she advised.
That night, we tried them out, with a little alcohol to relax. And there was one real advantage: the "beginner's" plug hurt like hell. But once I got over the initial sting, I found it to be a sexy bonding experience. It was a kind of breakthrough: we still use these (and other) toys regularly and I'll tell any friend who'll listen why it's worth going to a sex shop.
Not sure where to start? Join the club. Below you'll find advice from sexologists and women on the essential types of sex toys, including their usefulness, how to use them, and insider tips on how to get top-level pleasure from each one.
Although they may seem almost obsolete compared to all the vibrating, high-tech, action-packed toys available today, dildos are still the most popular and popular choice. a classic that many women and even more men love.I've seen people go from embarrassment, silence and shame to an open, cool and trendy attitude towards sex toys of all kinds, from dildos to anal beads. I love when people push their sexual boundaries to get out of their comfort zone, which can turn into a wonderful feeling of personal achievement and pleasure, or disgust, newly discovered. In any case, you learn something about your body and your partner.
If you are looking for the feeling of penetration They come in different shapes, lengths and widths, so take them into account when shopping (some women will find that slightly curved dildos are more effective for heating them, as they give a more direct action on the clitoris and the G spot), and consider using them both vaginally and anal. My ex liked to use a dildo for him, not for me," explains 30-year-old Audrey, "I wasn't very enthusiastic, I prefer a real cock or a vibrator, but he seemed to appreciate the novelty and the forbidden feeling of the dildo".
Sex dolls, also known as SexDolls, are essentially artificial people made to provide companionship and sexual pleasure. They are made to resemble men and women in almost every respect. The use of sex dolls is a major part of the sex trade.a quality TPE sex doll can really be incredible in terms of pleasure and realism. They have everything to please, right down to the shape of the nails and the softness of the nipples.
You can get a sex doll in a wide range of ethnicities, sizes, genders, and some models are even designed to look like elves or vampires. Imagination (and your budget) is the limit when it comes to sex dolls.
Made of silicone, the lovedoll allows you to let loose in bed like never before. Are you frustrated because your fantasies are a little too wild for your partner? That's what the sex doll is for. Its finish and realism give you feeling like you're having sex with a real woman. and it is possible to customize them according to your wildest desires.
The anal plug
Consider the anal plug as your introduction to anal play. Anal toys are popular with women. While they may not have the nerve sensitivity to directly induce orgasm in the anus, they can be mentally very excitingIf you are a beginner, start by showering and cleaning yourself first, then ask your partner to stimulate you with his fingers, or tongue if he is adventurous, before inserting a plug, vibrator or beads. It is also suggested that you use latex gloves or condoms on your fingers for cleanliness and anal lubricant for comfort.
"I have found that the key to introducing toys, whether anal toys, claws or other toys, is to set expectations and get ready," says 30-year-old Katie. "I mean the plugs are honestly a little scary, even if they're pastel pink, and if your partner only knows how to use them because he's done porn, the night probably won't end well. I like to get into teacher mode to explain how I feel while we're doing it. And it never hurts to get comfortable with the toy solo first, explore how your body reacts."
Attaching these things to your nipples hurts, but that's the point. A large part of the BDSM game is about pain, pain so good that it can take the form of a hot sensation for a lot of people, if only because it's so different from the way we feel every day.
"It hurts the most when my boyfriend takes the clamps off and I love it," says Sarah, 27. "Traffic comes back into my nipples after I get cut and it's unbelievable."
But don't leave them in too long or you risk cutting off the flow to your nipples! Many pliers come with sophisticated features such as adjustable pressure, a vibration option and a waterproof coating, but Sarah says she's heard that clothes pegs can be just as effective if you don't want to buy real ones.
It should be your favourite sex toyI suggest that women have a collection of vibrators, in different shapes, sizes and types of stimulators, to match their mood and the feeling they are looking for at that moment.
Sometimes you may want a big vibrating dildo that you can push at your own pace, and other times you can use a vibrating buttplug. Don't worry that regular use of a vibrator will over-stimulate your clitoris or prevent you from having fun with a good old-fashioned penis, that's a myth. It's a woman's responsibility to find what suits her and to be sexually available or not according to her desires. Sex toys tend to bring women to orgasm almost every time...so go ahead, use them!
"My boyfriend and I had a perfectly satisfying sex life, but the arrival of my vibrator has taken things up a notch," says 29-year-old Amy. Sometimes it takes me a really long time to achieve normal sex, which is rarely the case for him. When we don't have the time or energy for a one-hour session, the vibrator comes to the rescue by getting me out faster and with less work on both of our parts.
Handcuffs are more aboutmental and emotional arousal It can be very exciting to discuss the scene you're going to set up and get consent," she says, "It's a fabulous game that's gaining popularity because of its recent exposure and normalization in the media.
Just be careful - if you get into a super-authentic prisoner fantasy that involves real metal handcuffs, they can hurt. "You need soft, cozy handcuffs," says 30-year-old Jen. "I like to feel a little out of control when my partner's handcuffing me, especially when all the other parts of my life require effort and attention."
For women who find it hard to do without other sex-toys (or even their partners), a vibrator that focuses only on stimulating the most sensitive part of the vagina Unfortunately, men don't spend enough time playing with their clitoris, and women remain silent about their clitoral needs," she says. Use your clitoral massager while you're getting fucked, use it when you're asleep, let them see you use it so it becomes a couple activity," she suggests.
"I didn't think I was capable of orgasm because nothing seemed to work on my clitoris," says Emily, 30, from Boston. A clitoral stimulator, and I now own several, has changed that. They make me vibrate every time and the rest of my sex toy collection is virtually unused now. Sold?
Slightly different from anal plugs in that they insert one individual bead at a time rather than smoothly and progressively like a plug, anal beads provide a pop sensation every time they are inserted in a larger size. And while any anal toy will prepare you for anal sex, buttplugs are a little closer to that sensation.
"I've used both plugs and beads, and I like both, but I think it's more important to'invest in a set of high quality pearls if that's what you're interested in," says 26-year-old Alyssa. "The last thing you want is a pair of cheap pearls that break when they're inside you! Oh, and with either of them, make sure you...use a ton of lubricantor it'll be more pain than pleasure." That's good to know.
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